rebecca’s Neighborhood

Some time after Scotch and I got engaged, we were chillin' together somewhere and discussing the many improbable triumphs our relationship has seen. We marvelled at just how much fucking FUN we have together, and how happy and comfortable we are together. We boasted to ourselves about how, even during tough times, our enjoyment of and love for each other comes so easily. We began to feel like maybe we were cheating or something. Relationships aren't supposed to be this much fun, right? All you ever hear about is how much work they are. Now, don't get me wrong... we have to work at ours too. We've worked a tremendous amount on it. But, it's that kind of work that you love, partially because it's fun work, and partially because you know the payoff is huge. Anyway, as we got further in to our engagement and closer to our wedding day, we started to wonder if some authority figure was going to intervene and come up with some reason we wouldn't be allowed to be together.

"I'm sorry, folks, but the Department of Health has determined that you two simply don't detest each other enough to be a married couple. You're going to have to find more suitable mates."

We frequently joked about how there was no way we were going to get away with locking in eternal happiness. Why should we be so lucky? We imagined guys in black suits with dark glasses and earpieces suddenly grabbing one of us and throwing them in a van, never to be seen or heard from again.

The prophecy almost came true when, on their way to the ceremony, Nadia (the Maid of Honor) and Scotch were pulled over by the most unforgiving police officer in Hawaii and detained for a long time, while being berated for a variety of offenses, including crying over being late for one's own wedding. Meanwhile, my Best Man and I raced across the island to make up time lost to a faulty alarm clock. Storm clouds literally opened up a deluge of rain as we picked up the Most Awesome Flower Girl Ever on our way.

We all made it, of course. The weather cleared up and it was, honestly and without exaggeration, the most beautiful and amazing day I've ever seen. We said our vows (in Hawaiian and English), exchanged leis, exchanged rings, kissed, and sealed the deal. We made it, and nobody can fuck with that now.

Shortly after the ceremony, Scotch reminded me to check out the inside of my ring. I excitedly removed it, squinted, and read the most perfect and clever inscription:

There was a perfectly good reason for doing this, and yet it is utter silliness.  I had a lot of fun doing it, and only later realized that I'd left thousands of dollars worth of camera equipment hanging from my ceiling for several hours.

So not worth $3.75.  It wasn't very cold, lacked a full, deep chocolate flavor.  It also lacked good banana flavors.  Over all it was bland.  Maybe it just needed salt..  (Just kidding, not amount of salt would have made it worth $3.75.)

Thanks for listening, please carry on.

• 13:38 The zombie link from yesterday didn't work, so here's the real URL: pixelmaze.ca/tilted/?post_id=1753 #
• 19:34 @Erin1225: I totally have some Bacon Salt! They have a TypePad weblog too, so they're doubly cool. I can totally get behind their motto. #
• 19:36 @macgasm: I love the new picture. Hott. #
• 20:21 Order placed at Pei Wei (Mongolian beef). Yummy goodness in T-minus 15 minutes. #
• 21:28 @TheVille: Hah. You're a dork, but an adorable one. You've got tech advice in a DM! #
• 21:33 @TheVille: Yay! Just call me the next time something goes wrong. I'm a maybe at Red Lion on Friday; I have a birthday party that night. #
• 21:44 @TheFuzzball: Ha. I'll get on that soon. ;-) #
• 22:05 My shoulders and neck are killing me. Going to go take a bath in the whirlpool and read. #
• 01:06 @webgrrlie: Pei Wei is definitely yummy! It's basically a cheaper version of PF Chang's, if you've ever been there. You should try it! #
• 01:52 Going to bed finally, but wanted to point out more Zombie Walk pics: tinyurl.com/6n93gt We have got to do this in Houston! Anyone in? #

Kymberlie's Tweets automatically shipped by LoudTwitter. Blog comments are welcomed and encouraged!

Today in the Twitterverse:

• 14:07 Voting #

Automatically shipped by LoudTwitter

Of the trip.

photo.jpg

This is a true story. I did not write it. The names have been eliminated to protect the stupid.

On our way back from dropping [names] off at the airport, we stopped for lunch at Marie Callender's. We both ate a wonderful chicken salad with pecans, oranges, and gorgonzola cheese. Since they were running a 99 cent pie special, of course we were forced to have pie for dessert. [Name] ordered lemon meringue, and I ordered blueberry with cream.

 

As we were walking to the car, [name] glanced down and noticed a large glop on the front of his shirt. He complained about how he can't seem to eat anything without dropping some on himself. Then, he reached down and scooped the glop off of his shirt and popped it into his mouth, while I watched in amazement.

 

His eyes began to bug out immediately, and he gagged and coughed. When I asked him what was wrong, all he could manage was a strangled, "Bird poop!"

 

After a few minutes of hysterical laughing, I asked him why he would scoop ANYTHING off of his shirt and put it into his mouth - no less an anonymous goopy stain.

 

His reply was, "Well, I wanted to find out if it was blueberry or lemon."

 

I think that we need to watch him more closely in the future.

• 11:06 @photojunkie: Happy birthday, doll! *kiss* #
• 11:42 I still feel groggy from last night's Ambien. It was nice to get a good night's sleep for once, though. #
• 15:19 Thinking Sambuca later tonight to hear Tianna sing if anyone's interested. #
• 15:30 Hey, all Houston Twitterers, what do you guys think of doing a zombie walk? Think of the photo opportunities! tinyurl.com/5pucfv #
• 19:17 Getting dressed. Going to head to Ernie's on Banks for a little bit before going to hear Tianna at Sambuca. #
• 21:32 At Sambuca. All the normal bartenders are gone. I feel adrift! #
• 01:38 In Geeklandia, TVs will be banned from bars. #

Kymberlie's Tweets automatically shipped by LoudTwitter. Blog comments are welcomed and encouraged!